Sending Your Kids Back to School With Food Allergies

The first day of school is a nervewracking event for any parent, but for parents of children with food allergies it can be even more challenging. Like most moms I am thinking about the clothes they need and the supplies they will require, but I am also thinking about the medicine I will be sending with them, whether or not their classroom will be peanut-free and whether or not they will be eating in a safe place that keeps them away from potential allergens.

Unfortunately, I am an expert in this matter, having two children, 7 and 4, with food allergies, one in preschool and one in the public school. Along with bug spray and sunblock and lunchboxes, soy, eggs, peanuts, peas and tree nuts are always on our minds. 

Our story

My older son was diagnosed with a peanut allergy one day after a visit to his grandfathers house. "Papa" innocently gave Andy a peanut butter cookie to eat and within seconds, he threw it up and became violently ill.  On a hunch it was an allergy, we gave him Benadryl and called the pediatrician, never imagining that she would say to bring him down to the emergency room. Six hours later, we left the emergency room with a prescription for an Epi Pen and a new outlook on life. 

For the first few months, I would walk past peanut butter on the shelf in a store and steer clear. We used humor to get through it, "Why do they put poison on the shelf like that?" we would joke. But it was a very challenging time. It provoked a lot of anxieties in me that I am still dealing with. Who would have thought food could be deadly?

Sending him off to school was a new lesson in trusting others. I would talk and talk again with the teachers and the directors of his preschool. I distinctly chose that particular preschool because we felt they seemed to have the best response to our food allergy needs. Then came public school and I had to start that process again.  The nurse at school became my point person. She and I have gotten to know each other very well.  Every year I bring in the Epi Pen and Benadryl and the new "action plan" provided by my son's allergist.

How to prepare

Depending on your children's allergies, your preparation may be different. If your children have an allergy which will allow them to eat hot lunches, you may have to do more research. Calling the cafeteria and making contact with the coordinator there may be vital in keeping your child safe. In my case, because of soy, my son does not eat hot lunch. So, I pack a lunch for him every day - 180 days of the school year. I get to offer him a healthy balanced lunch which I know is 100-percent safe.

My son eats at the "peanut free" table. So far he doesn't really care and some of his little buddies are also peanut-allergic, so they sit there as well. In the future, and other food allergy moms will tell you, the kids may want to sit with their friends at the "regular" table.  This decision should be made with the child, his/her allergist and the school nurse.

Special snacks

Special snacks in the classroom can get difficult, but not impossible.  My son was in a classroom that was designated peanut-free last year.  This was the first step in the right direction. But every once in a while, his teacher would very kindly call me in advance to let me know that a special snack would be offered at the end of the week. That would give me time to purchase a similar, safe snack to send in with my son so that he would not feel left out. As a parent, you can also bring in a few snack options chosen with your child that the teacher can have on hand if she/he needs them.

Get involved

I also offered myself and became very involved in his first grade classroom. A couple of times, when the teacher wanted to do a classwide snack, I offered to buy for the whole class or bake for the whole class so that my son could eat along with the group. When they decorated cupcakes, I sent two of his cupcakes in with things to decorate it with. 

Communication

Sometimes I get questions like: "I will bake these from scratch, so can he eat them?" Depending on the parent and the allergy, the answer may be "yes" or "no." Because of the number of allergies my son has, I do not allow him to eat what others bake. It is more of a cross-contamination issue. In other words, that mom may have used an allergen in that same pan one week earlier. It takes time to explain to teachers, other parents and others who take care of your children what their needs are, but it is so vital in helping them take care of your child.  It is not only an opportunity to educate others about allergies, it is also helpful in letting them know what your expectations are.

Despite all there is to think about, my kids are excited about the new school year - the thought of new friends and new teachers and new experiences. Although we are tempted to keep our children in a protective bubble all their lives, I have grown over the past five years to learn how to manage my fears, communicate what our needs are, to figure out what to offer in the way of help and how I can manage this health issue without it taking over their young lives.

If you are sending your food allergic children to school for the first time, tell me, how have you have planned? What is your biggest fear?